Daily Advice: HOT vs BEAUTIFUL

Our world has been hit with the worst epidemic we've seen in decades, and that my friends is called the "selfie." If you scroll through anyone's social media news feed, you are destined to find at least 10 girls flooding the stream with their new "modeling" pics of them posing in the mirror in a thong and covering their bare tits with their hands. And no, i'm not a fat chick behind the computer pissed because I don't look like these girls. As a matter of fact, myself and many of my friends have been blessed with what men would consider an appealing "outer exterior," but we just so happen to show it differently.

Narcissism has been taken to a completely different level, and we're making it seem OK by double tapping and following on Instagram. I get it if modeling is actually your career and that's how you make a living. You're not who I'm talking about, and I respect it. I'm talking about these girls who would be so much more BEAUTIFUL if they decided to smile and take a picture with their girlfriends; rather than smother self tanner on, make a kissy face, stick their ass out in the mirror, throw on a Victoria s Secret bombshell bra to make their tits 4 sizes bigger, add a "Valencia" filter, and then post it on all forms of social media for the world to see. "#IamwhoIam"...No sweetie, that's your extensions talking.

I decided to dig a little deeper into this and figure out just why girls find this OK to do? First, I looked at about 20 of my immediate close girlfriends who all graduated college, have great jobs, and come from great families. Want to know what I found? Not ONE of them had a selfie of them trying to seek attention on Instagram. Am I starting to see a pattern here? I'm not saying just because you post a picture of yourself in your new bikini on Instagram that you're uneducated and your daddy never loved you. What I'm saying is that there are so many beautiful women I know who don't have to do that because they'd rather seek respect from others, not attention. 

I think it's sad that more women these days are striving to be the next "chivette" or "smokeshow of the day" by exposing their entire bodies for 17 year old boys to jack off to. There have been actual STUDIES done on selfies, that's how extreme this has gotten. Dr. Pamela Rutledge, Director of Media Psychology Research Center in Boston, Massachusetts said "
“Selfies frequently trigger perceptions of self-indulgence or attention seeking social dependence that raises the damned-if-you-do and damned-if-you-don’t spectre of either narcissism or very low self-esteem." Rutledge stated,“Preoccupation with selfies can be a visible indicator of a young person with a lack of confidence or sense of self that might make him or her a victim of other problems as well.” This goes back to my forever philosophy of learning to love yourself. Yeah, I like to get dressed up, put makeup on, feel beautiful, and I post pictures on Instagram. It's 2014, that is the generation we are living in. However, if 99%  of your social media pictures are of YOU and only YOU, I challenge you to 1) Get off your phone and go smell the fresh air outside 2) Make some friends.

I've asked a few of my guy friends what the difference between "hot" and "beautiful" is. The majority of them all had the same response: A "hot" girl is someone you just want to have sex with, and nothing long term. You wouldn't kick her into bed, but you'd kick her out. A beautiful girl is someone you know you have to work for, you respect, and you can take home to mom. Unfortunately, we don't all look like Jessica Alba but beauty fades and herpes doesn't.  Being beautiful doesn't have to do entirely with your exterior. I know dozens of men who would prefer a smart funny girl, over the girl whose biggest accomplish this year was being named "Barstoolu of the Day." So keep on posting mirror pics in that new bikini girl, we will talk in a few years...

"HOT"

BEAUTIFUL